Monday, February 25, 2008

Definition of Frat Party

Keg+Red Cups+Gross Bathroom+Beer Pong hallway+Awkward circles of freshman+That one loud guy+Tunage+Sticky Floor+Paddle on the Wall

How to attend one:
1. get bored in your dorm room (If you don't drink I suggest you skip to number 16)
2. someone ("The Instigator") be acquaintances with someone in a frat ("The Hookup")
3. girls: get in as little clothing as you feel socially comfortable in
4. guys: say some snotty remark about the girls' outfits then continue to stare
5. leave dorm and walk toward frat houses
6. meander throughout neighborhood until someone ("The Brain") knows where they are in relation to the house
7. upon arrival to house "The Instigator" leads the way in trying to find "The Hookup" before the whole group looks like idiots
8. make sure to make a lot of happy "i know you" noise once "The Hookup" is found
9. tap the keg
10. stand in circle pretending to be having a good time
11. when boys walk by smile and laugh at nothing
12. in about 10 minutes hint that your feet are tired, or you have a headache, or the smoke smell is bothering you
13. in another 5 minutes someone in group "The Rescuer" get the courage to say "lets go"
14. others "reluctantly" but truly thankfully agree
15. leave party and make comments of how lame Frat Parties are
16. back at dorms have fun with your actual friends just goofing around then eventually go to bed

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

iiiiiiii like it. sounds like fun. the #16. not so much the rest.
so i have so far only figured out how to comment anonymously...so this is ali. :)